It seems so unfair. Look at any animal species on this planet: males rarely ever have any trouble finding females to mate with. They just do it on instinct! And here you are, human with all your superior brain power, sitting home late at night, alone after a house party where you talked to three measly girls before giving up because all the conversations fizzled out. How come some seem to know all the ways to attract women, and others just get stuck and blown out right at the beginning? This question plagues many men who are trying to improve their dating lives?
Nonchalance
News flash: there is no way to attract all the women in the world. There is not even a way to attract all the women you want. No matter how awesome you become, there will always be one completely resistant to you. There can be any number of reasons why that is, and yet, a lot of my students ascribe every failed attraction attempt to their own lack of skills. This is a vicious circle, because the next woman will feel the pressure they put on themselves, and be uneasy when they talk to her.
Before you can discover what attracts women, you need the right attitude: treat every interaction as a little adventure with many chances, and any possible outcome. This mindset shift can make a significant difference in your approach. Of course, the better your seduction skills get, the more bad outcomes you can eliminate. But even the most experienced seducers don’t expect any outcome from an interaction, let alone try to force one.
They just chill and see what that person opposite them is like.
Go where women are
With all your relaxed, easy attitude in place, you still need to put yourself into the trajectory of women. Needless to say, that trajectory will be outside your house. But you don’t have to start there!
For the lazy among you, you can take the first step to getting great woman – which is being social and making real, live friends – right on the internet. The answer lies within sites like facebook or meetup.com, where you can look up all the great events and groups in your city that cater to your personal interests.
Let’s go through an example exploration here. You with me? All right, go to meetup.com. See the section at the top of the page that says “Find a Meetup Group Near You!”? All right, let’s say you’re into photography. Type it into the first field. Now, let’s say you live in London, England. Type it in and click on “search”.
Boom! Over 60 meetups at the time of writing. Sign up (costs nothing), join these groups and hang out with them the next time they meet up.
Notice what I did here: I asked you to look for something that you are interested in! Yes, a good “trick” to meet great women is to just look for people who share your interests.
I don’t think I need to point out that you can easily do the same thing on facebook. Check out the groups or pages that your friends are already members or fans of, and find out what else is happening in your city (which should have its own network on facebook).
Look up events on there, find the open ones that allow everybody to join. There are tons of them out there – so many people and organizations advertise their parties, get-togethers, functions and more on facebook now, it’s easy to find and join anything. (Also, check out our guide to impressing girls on Facebook)
Your social circle
Sites like meetup, facebook, myspace, twitter are social networks. As such, they have the expansion of your social circle built-in. Meeting new people has never been easier than today. Now, you have the means to both find people, and to approach them with nonchalant outcome-independence.
All you need to do now is actually go out and do it. While talking to strangers won’t always seem easy or worthwhile, even in surroundings where people share your interests, it’s crucial to understand what women find attractive. After you take action, you’ll always be happy you didn’t let that one opportunity slip by. The more you talk to people, the more ways to attract women you will discover.
